Surviving today – Therapy Thursdays


The world feels unbearable, stifling and madding. At times, as if it is spinning out of control with no end in sight. You question who you can trust and every day you are astonished by what the media reports and what you hear others say. You see the cracks in the systems. Where society is failing. And you’ve become to exhausted to fight. To overwhelmed to know where to start. You are drowning in your emotions and the emotions being emitted around you. Each day is a roller coaster of anger, fear, sadness, shame, guilt and grief. You pray for the storm to break, for the sun to crack the ominous grey sky, if only for a brief bit. You long for that second of sun on your face. That limited flash of fresh air. That pause to breath in deeply and know that you are okay and that life is okay. For that exhale to release it all and know that you are held. But that moment isn’t coming. There is no break in the clouds. The rain pours. The winds thrash, hurl and rip.  Surrounded by people hiding in the perceived safety of their homes. Pretending the storm isn’t destroying everything. Those who rush by and through pretending that storm isn’t there.  And you are growing weary, losing hope and faith. Is this the reality of your life?

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Some people want to be the change. Some meet the challenge and become agents of change. Others fear what change entails and hide. The thing about change is it happened wither we want it to or not. Change is painful. Change is scary. Our world is mirroring our changing as a society and as individuals. People are voicing their concerns. Fighting for what they believe. While others continue to move through life as if it’s the same. Pretending that nothing is different. Ignoring the news. Some people lead the change, some people hid. Judging them isn’t going to help you. They are doing the best they can. You don’t know them and you haven’t walked a mile in their shoes. Don’t kid yourself that you understand. You don’t. We all have our own experiences and ways we see the world. You don’t have to agree with everyone. And you don’t have to carry their burden.


If you are driven to understand, those who think differently. Bury their heads. Run. Hid. Ignore. Talk to them, openly, without judgement. And don’t take what they say personally. We all see the world skewed through our lives and experiences. Some people have the ability to flex their judgements upon receiving new information. Some are stuck.
So many people, perhaps you are one of them. Feel the pain of the world. Feel overwhelmed and lost in the cracks. Not knowing where to turn or where to go. It’s okay. You don’t have to have the answers or to fight alone.
However, to survive:

You are going to have to know yourself. Your baggage. Your wounds, traumas, triggers and shadow. You are going to have to get real with your limitations,  strengths and weaknesses. It’s time to get real with yourself. Your expectations  and standards of yourself, others and the world. You are going to have to know who your tribe is and if you need to create one. You are going to need a place to process your feelings, a place for you to be witnessed and held, without judgment (that’s what I do – and there’s many more out there like me). You need to give yourself permission to feel what you feel. Without judgement, feelings are messengers. Listen and witness them. They are your allies.


You are gong to have to give yourself permission to set and hold boundaries, without guilt or shame. That means listening to yourself and your needs. Saying no when you need to.


You are going to need to know when your container is full or overflowing and allow yourself to empty it. It isn’t your job to hold everyone’s shit. You are not the garage person. Cut yourself some slack, you are human.


You will need to implement soul care and honor it. If you feel guilt or shame around tending to you. Remember, if you can’t take care of you, how can you help others? Time to start loving yourself unconditionally because when you do, others will to.


Start a list. Write down what rejuvenates you. Feeds you. Makes you feel good. Makes you happy. Whole. Alive. Loved. What you are grateful for. And keep adding to your list. Because each day your soul is going to need something different. Maybe a full body cry (let it flow, you are releasing). Perhaps a nap (you are replenishing). Get outside (nature heals). Laugh (because it too heals). Don’t censor or judge what you need, lean in with permission. Fill you with you.

Remember each day is a new day. Some days are going to suck. That’s how life works. Some days are going to be amazingly awesome. And that’s perfectly okay.

 

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