Lost Life: Sitting in the nothingness

Sitting in the painful silence. Waiting for a sign. A sign that I have no idea what it is, what it looks like, sounds like, tastes like, feel like. I have no idea how it will come to me other than illusive thoughts, transient ephemeral moments where I get a glimpse of something, and then…

Depression

Inward scratching pushing outward Nausea turns the stomach, creeping upward and trying to escape Unsettled body, abandoned long ago, holder of memories, pain, trauma-adorned, covered to distract and hide. long neglected a empty prison Thoughts invading, abstractions causing angst Emotions flooding overflowing uncontrollable trembling bones, prickly skin Body emitting The only option is to flee,…

Facing Fear (Therapy Thursday)

Is fear stopping you from being your authentic self? Many of us hold back who we are. We allow fear to stop us from shining our own brilliant light. Is fear is keeping you from living life? Maybe fear has trapped you. Do you feel everything around you and have become isolated because you fear…

Suicide doesn’t have to be the answer

I wrote this a couple years ago, posted it on an old blog. And it is still relevant.  Especially in light of Chester Bennington’s suicide. These are still words that need to be heard. Because I want you to understand, that even if it doesn’t feel like it, you matter! Suicide is a permanent solution…

Using your Dreams for Guidance (Therapy Thursday)

Dreams are our portal to our souls.  Dreams can provide massive insight into our lives.  You might not realize it but while you are dreaming, your dreams are answering the questions you pounder and ask while you are awake. Often times in the language of the subconscious, but with some practice you’ll be decoding your…

Broken pieces (psychosis and spirituality)

Piece by piece. Part by part. Like a trail of tear, we leave pieces of ourselves behind Easier to run then to stay. We hate being in pain. We avoid it at all costs. Magic heals. Belief heals. Desire heals. We heal.  We unconsciously emit our wounds and traumsa. They seep out affecting our perceptions…

Depression (Therapy Thursday)

We fear those emotions that we do not like to feel. As if by feeling them they will consume, swallow and change us. This fear is not unfounded. I have been swallowed by depression. Consumed with grief. Changed from melancholy. It’s the dark that we fear. The being caught in quicksand with no life rope….

The Art of Dissociation (psychosis and spirituality)

Her eyes are empty as she tells the story of her rape. His face blank has he tells the story of years of torture and abuse. To some, they may seem cold and distant. Unemotional. I see self-preservation. I see the self, the soul, the body doing everything it can to save its self. To…

The Sin of Happy and the Honor in Misery (Therapy Thursday)

Why is it so hard to be happy? Why do we fight it? Why would we rather spend time complaining then talking about the good things? Well, there are a couple of reasons. Our society thrives off of drama, look at our television shows. We find our meaning as people through suffering. Many of us…

And it matters why?

Caught up in others Good, bad, indifferent matters depends on the lens We care about the impressions that we make on others. Other’s opinions of us matter. Know that all impressions are based on our own perceptions, ideas, feelings, past, beliefs and so on. We can’t always influence how others feel about us. Be kind. Do…

Catapulting where?

Hurling forwards, or backwards, striving for control fear stops, heart ignites So often in life we feel forced towards some direction. We perceive that life is throwing us off the edge, or others are controlling our decisions. We struggle to keep control in our lives, often times undermining ourselves to stay safe. Fear often rules how…

Communicating without words (Therapy Thursday)

There is it.  You’ve stopped in your tracks.  This beautiful painting that has prohibited you from moving on, drawn you in and now you are lost in and held captive by its images. Frustrated, sitting in traffic.  Then you hear it. That song.  You crank up the dial.  Forgetting the traffic, getting lost in the…